Garfieldhug's Blog

This & That Including What Ails

Circle – One Word Prompt

Circle of life…..

Or as Meet The Fokkers would chime…circle of trust!

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Saturday Giggles

This biscuit will be great for breakfast!

English translations….

Parking lot for a witch? Or for me🤔

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How To Die Properly…..

For the last 6 years, I was an active advocate in a voluntary capacity for seniors’ wellbeing. 

I enjoyed this as it gave me an opportunity to understand what it was like to be old and faced with a mountain of issues, including expressing the “right way to die”

LOL! Yes, I can hear people laughing when I pen this but truth is, many of the seniors here die without expressing their wishes or desire. Their concerns like burial rites, post death offerings or wishes die with them in silence.

I remember my co-chair member, Mr How To Die, always having long discussions with me on “how to die” – we are both not that old but we recognize that death the Grim Reaper is indiscriminate and collects anyone of any age as he has a quota to fill.

People don’t talk about death as it is macabre and an ill omen….a taboo!

So when I had an unfortunate health incident that put me at death’s door or being a potential quadriplegic, Mr How To Die rushed to my hospital bedside. I was thankful for his company.

We joked and laughed about “How to die” and I assured him that the several instruments to help me were done.

Firstly, the Advance Medical Directive – this disallowed unnecessary medical attempts to resuscitate me or keep me on unnecessary life prolonging measures.

We laughed as I said to him – “let me die in peace, with dignity and save unnecessary costs!” – yes, the joke in lil red dot is, one must die quickly and not a lingering death as medical costs are exorbitant!

Secondly, Lasting Power Of Attorney – this was necessary if in the event, I became the living dead. This is the worst stage of anyone’s life as I may remain in a permanently vegetative state either comatose or awake without ability to scratch or move.

Again, we laughed as I said to him – “Done….at least I will have clean diapers as I hate wading in own poo!”

Third and final instrument was the Will. The ultimate hurrah!

“Done”, I said to him. “Garfield is well taken care of and this favorite bugger of mine will be interred, intact with me in my 2 room niche! Not cremated!” We laughed as I hugged Garfield tightly.

Good news is that I made it, all senses and mobility intact.

Bad news is that Mr How To Die suffered a huge loss when his 12 year old son keeled over and died in a bus on the way to school. This happened shortly after my health scare. It has been 3 years ago since his son passed.

I could not make sense of it and I knew it hit Mr How To Die very hard. His only son and what makes it worst, is that there was no closure for him. He never had a chance to say goodbye to his son that day as he never expected his son to be shanghaied by Grim Reaper from him.

Although Mr How To Die hardly shed a tear in front of me and keeps a stoic face whilst we continue to serve as volunteers, I know he is wrecked inside.

This year, we both took on a new 6 year term of office. Sadly, I will not be able to serve with him in the same committee as we did such a good job such that the Dukes of Yore dissolved the need for the committee. Happy problem!

I now serve to help people find employability as lil red dot is seeing a huge rate of unemployment for 45ers to 62 years old.

The lessons I have learnt in doing voluntary work is that, we can never be too prepared.

Age discrimination is practiced as many companies and government institutions prefer not to hire “older” or mature workers.

The polite terms they use to decline potential candidates are “ we allow the person to grow into the role” – point blank it means, “we hired the other candidate as it allowed the person to grow in the role. It does not allow the person to die in the role”

So, it is a long road ahead of me to help this sector and today, I started with media and writing to the Dukes of Yores to commence my case against age discrimination.

Wish me luck!

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You Still Want To Park Here?

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Holy Answers Best Answered Through Laughter

Little April was not the best student in

Sunday school.

Usually she slept through the class.

One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, “Tell me, April, who created the universe?”

When April didn’t stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear.

“GOD ALMIGHTY!” shouted April and the

teacher said, “Very good” and April fell back asleep.

A while later the teacher asked April, “Who is our Lord and Saviour,” But, April didn’t even stir from her slumber.

Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again.

‘JESUS CHRIST!” shouted April and the

teacher said, “very good,” and April fell back to sleep.

Then the teacher asked April a third question.

“What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?”

And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin.

This time April jumped up and shouted, “IF

YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE

MORE TIME, I’LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND

STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!”

The Teacher fainted!

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Witty – One Word Prompt

I like to think that I’m witty,

It’s a pity I’m not that pretty.
People laugh when I’m witty,

But not when I’m behaving ditty.
Sometimes life gets shitty,

Pardon my “French”, but you know I’m being witty!
I like being batty when witty,

Just not catty!

And don’t call me fatty! Pretty please☺

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My Friday Wisdom…Maybe….You Think?

Passion is the buzz word these days for social causes, business development or anything really.

A teacher will say, “You must be passionate about education and have the tenacity to manage children these days! They are a harder lot to manage as their parents fiercely guard them and give teachers a hard time”

A social cause champion will say, “You must be passionate about the cause and believe in it. If not, it is hard to be championing its cause and delivering the goals you set out to do and help the marginalized, people with special abilities or less fortunate.”

An employer will say, “Without passion at work, you cannot succeed in life or stay on as our employee. Zest, pep, gumption and creativity are essential for employees. Distinct yourself and make people notice you.”

Passion is best served with impassion.

Passion is not delivered in one session to ensure sustainability of any worthy cause.

Passion is not derived from the Passion fruit.

Passion is innate and not cultivated. Some disagree, but I digress!

Passion is reflective of our impassioned selves seeking to serve the greater good with compassion and other feel good emotions.

My motto is to be passionate about social causes I believe in but I will not hesitate to pull the handbrake and walk away when I smell a rat!

If passionate people who are impassioned by a cause they deem worthy of supporting recognize the deviants who may utilize it to profit selves, they must stop and step away.

I think with my heart most times, but my brain has to work too. So brain takes over when the statistics do not add up!

Guard on! Or as Master of Karate Kid would say, “wax on, wax off! Wax on, wax off!”

LOL! My Friday wisdom ……..I Hope!

 

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Confused About “Service?”

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The New Adventures Of Classmate (CM)

For some years now, I have been wondering what happened to CM. I tried asking people I knew or googled him on Facebook or LinkedIn but no luck!

But lo and behold, I bumped into him at a marine seminar. I did not recognize him as he was dressed in an audaciously loud florescent lime green shirt with an interesting Buddha amulet on a black cable round his neck!

He looked like a regular bad boy type image and oh…he sounds loud too.

After we exchanged name card greetings, I looked at him and with wide eyes asked him as I read out his name on the card.

CM is a GM (ha ha I know it rhymes!) of a ship surveying company and he is really eccentric.

From the time we met, which was last week, he has been sending me daily photos of his meals for breakfast, lunch and dinner!

Today he had both carrot cake (*savory local hawker food delight) and vegetarian rice vermicelli with mock meats. This is an extremely heavy breakfast and his lunch is equally heavy!

He eats like there is no tomorrow and smokes like a chimney! I am alarmed for him as he has a daughter and of course a wife.

For past time activities, he shared with me that it is mahjong and cycling with his wife.

All the cycling will not eradicate all the nicotine he inhales nor bad fats from the foods he consume.

From what I surmised, he has led a colorful life, running a karaoke joint of which he shared that he lost $300,000 and often stays in China. He is a naughty boy too as he is a sugar daddy there in China to some sweet young thing.

I am shocked honestly at how he has morphed. In school he was cheeky but he now epitomizes a big bad boy and nothing nice comes out of his mouth.

As an example we spoke of 2 classmates.

Classmate 1, he told me has been made a bankrupt. We both knew him to be obscenely rich. CM ended the conversation with him to me in one sentence – “he deserved it”

Classmate 2, he shared that she is probably dead as it has been some months since he has received any text message from her. We both knew this girl to be netballer in school. “She has cancer” – he was not interested to know what cancer and brushed her off. He asked me to text her and find out if she was dead.

A strange person he has become! Or maybe I am the weird one?

Oh…for his sake, I do wish him a long and healthy life!

 

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Trying To Understand How Your Dog Feels

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