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X’mas Laughs

The Truth About Santa’s Christmas
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Blondes Can Be Smart!

A blonde walks into a bank in London and asks to see the manager. She says she’s going to Hong Kong on business for two weeks and needs to borrow £5,000.

The manager says the bank will need some kind of security for the loan, so the blonde hands over the keys to a new Ferrari.

The car is parked on the street in front of the bank, she has the title and everything checks out. The bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan.

The manager and the tellers all enjoy a good laugh at the blonde for using a £200,000 Ferrari as collateral against a £5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then proceeds to drive the Ferrari into the bank’s underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the blonde returns, repays the £5,000 and the interest, which comes to £17.41.

The manager says, ‘Miss, we are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are a little puzzled.

While you were away, we checked you out and found that you are a millionairess. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow £5,000?’

The blonde replies…’Where else in central London can I park my car for two weeks for only £17.41 and expect it to be there when I return?’

Hooray! A smart blonde joke at last!! 🤣

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Tips For Lesser Dramas In Life

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Honesty Amongst Classmates

Three women, Jan, Sue and Mary haven’t seen each other since leaving school.

They rediscover each other via Facebook and arrange to meet for lunch …

Jan arrives first, wearing a beige Versace dress. She orders a bottle of Pinot Grigio.

Sue arrives shortly afterward, wearing a grey Chanel number. After the initial hugs and kisses she joins Jan in a glass of wine.

Then Mary walks in, wearing a faded old tee-shirt, blue jeans and boots. She too shares the wine.

Jan explains that after leaving school and attending Oxford University she met and married Roddy, with whom she has a beautiful daughter.

Roddy is a partner in one of Sydney’s leading law firms. They live in a penthouse apartment on The North Shore and Susanna, their daughter, attends drama school. They have a second home in Bali.

Sue relates that she graduated from Monash University, studied to become a doctor and became a surgeon.

Her husband, Kevin, is a leading financial investment banker in Melbourne.

They live in a large home in Toorak and have a second home in Italy.

Mary explains that after she left school at 17, she ran off with her boyfriend, Bones.

They run a tropical bird park on the Sunshine Coast and grow their own vegetables.

Bones can stand five parrots, side by side, on his erect penis.

Halfway down the third bottle of wine and several hours later,

Jan blurts out that her husband is really a cashier at Target they live in a small apartment and have a camper trailer parked on the front drive.

Sue, chastened and encouraged by her old friend’s honesty, explains that she and Kevin are both nursing care assistants in an old people’s home.

They live in Hoppers Crossing and take camping holidays on the Murray.

Mary admits that the fifth parrot has to stand on one leg.

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How To Drive Out Fakers During War

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Some Truths…

Guilty as charged! These trays are horrendously hard to carry back to the slots in the freezer.
LOL…Google has an answer for everything!
I am a woman driver and my mum always tell me “stop” when I am approaching traffic lights.
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Original Version Of Google

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Exercise? Nope!

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When You Party Too Hard

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X’mas Laughs

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