Tuesday’s Think Thoughts

I was so glad that Mr Nice told me he could be discharge from hospital today and that his wife and 2 sons will take turns to help him with his urinary catheter and urinary bag for the next 10 days whilst he recovers, before the urinary catheter and urinary bag can be disposed of.

I know the feeling as post spinal surgery, I was hooked up to a Pethidine dispensing machine that allowed me to press when I feel pain and release Pethidine to ease my pain. I was also hooked up with a urinary catheter and urinary bag. I was flat on my bed for 7 days before I was allowed to be up and about.

I begged for the opening in my neck for IV plug to be removed by day 3 as I was eating and not dizzy but was refused till day 5. Apparently I have baby veins and the veins collapsed once the IV drip went in. So Dr Anaes had to do one IV plug through use of my carotid vein. He shared that this was usually used for open heart surgeries and or other major heart surgeries as this vein was large.

I learnt humility as I laid on my back. I was beholden to the nurses for keeping me clean and made it point to be up by 4.30am so that the 2 out of 3 nurses in the night shift could be less burdened as they had to take care of 12 patients nightly. This way, they can sponge me and move on to do other things.

By day 7 I forced self to get up on commode and be wheeled to the toilet and it was super painful. I now know how people with disabilities or post operations feel.

I had to wear a diaper at night as getting 2 nurses to help me each time to get to the toilet would be a chore and it eased their workload. I did not like it, but I had no choice.

I also learnt to reflect on my life.

What does chasing the extra dollar means to me if I have no life or mobility to pick it up. My mum is wise and reminded me that without health, even if one million bucks dropped in front of me, I cannot even bend down to pick it up, much less lug it home to keep. But yes, I know that legally, I need to report it to the police station as finders is not keepers and yes, I could not even lug it to the police station!!

I am also thankful that I did not get married. Chances are with my myriad surgeries (32 as at 31 May 2022), no husband will still stand by me and live up to the oath of “in sickness and in health, till death do us part!” – I will be a forever burden to the chap!

But I am also open to the fact that I get lonely as I age. I will probably need to live in a nursing home in the future or in an assisted living facility and make new friends to co-exist with. I hope the nursing home quality and standard of living improves from now as what I have seen is quite dreadful here. The 5 star ones costs SGD15,000 for a single room and for that price, I might as well live in a 5 star serviced apartment. This cost excludes medical care, medicines and or laundry etc.

So, I will rot like an old crotchety woman, with a raggy Garfield in tow, watching CSI reruns or NCIS series or some other new police drama like Hudson and Rex.

I have given up on romantic love. After MR EX, I decided that love is not real and is superficial.

Even unconditional love becomes conditional. I started out being supportive of a housekeeper at Bates Motel. I gave her money for this or that when she moaned about her husband being unwell in Malaysia. It was small amounts of SGD10, then it increased to SGD50 which added up to a fair bit during my stay each time.

3 days ago, this housekeep forwarded me a text that the income tax department wanted her to pay SGD1,700+ for her income tax. I knew then, that Housekeeper wanted me to pay for this. I stood firm and turned her down as I too, had to earn my money and this is now getting to be sizeable amounts.

If I was Warren Buffet, I could pay for Housekeeper but Housekeeper lives in a landed property in Malaysia and has 2 adult sons. But I am not! I am a wage owner with my own expenses and family to care for.

Housekeeper is not entirely truthful and information comes in dribs and drabs and only after 10 years, I learnt that there were 2 sons instead of 1 son.

I learnt the lesson of “kindness being taken for weakness” too.

I do not know how I will end up in life and if I had a wish, I will not want to live long if there is no quality of life. I do not want anymore surgeries and want this 32nd surgery to be the mother of all surgeries and it ENDS!

I am not depressed or suicidal. I am practical.

Lil Red Dot is an expensive place to live in and it is quite impossible to retire and think savings will suffice. All it takes is a major catastrophic illness to wipe up hundreds of thousands of savings as insurers are now wising up to medical costs and may not approve all hospital and surgical claims.

If I need SGD2,500 to live a month, I will need SGD900,000 to survive me if I live till 90 years old. But this is unrealistic as with premium increments for medical insurances and cost of living, I will probably need SGD5,000 a month and I will need SGD1.8 million if I live till 90 years old.

I sincerely hope I can croak tomorrow. Easier as I will have funds to take care of self and Garfield (poor fella will then be stuffed into the niche with me).

Bummer!

Ta Da….Here’s Garfield…Garfields Galore

I had to re-wrap my Garfields as over time, the cellophane paper I use gets dusty and dirty.

This little tyke below was given to me by Duchess Of Yore on 30 September 12, which makes him 9 years old.

This identical replica was given to me by Chicken. When I sent her this photo she replied, “Teenager now…can look after me soon” – She is a hoot sometimes as it was in 1990s that she gave me this Garfield.

Below are re-wrapped Garfields that I can now display on my newly acquired steel cabinet. Mr Ability To Earn gave me the Garfield that is standing on left. The identical one on right but with a different tunic was from Mr Nice. Chicken’s Garfield is lying supine and the ones in the basket are from Duchess of Yore and MR EX.

This Garfield below is 27 years old and was a gift from my mum as I had lost my Garfield in Turkey back then. I love this one most as he sleeps with me and goes where I go…..Hong Kong, Macau, Zhuhai, GuangZhou, Hainan, Perth, Western Australia, Adelaide, Bates Motel, except ICU as my surgeon said only if he is “boiled” can he be with me!! Heavens no way!!

Garfields are rather extinct now….I hardly see him on sale. Maybe he is not a choice of toy by today’s young ones!

When It Gets Busier

This week has been chokeful of events. But today tops the list as I was made to pose for a journalist photographer.

I am not drop dead Barbie nor a gorgeous babe and I usually do badly at being photographed.

The journalist photographer was really sweet and kind, a veteran at a leading local newspaper. He spotted my love for Garfield and spent time trying to incorporate my inanimate furball Garfield into the photo of me, with Mousie by Garfield’s side.

I told the journalist photographer that I am sure the Editor will not pick a photo of me with my inanimate furballs and he laughed, looked at me and said he is the “boss” of photos.

Still I feel that it may not happen as they might want a serious pose of me. I was told to pose for a serious picture too.

Gee…now I know why models or film stars comment that they get tired from photo shoots! I spent 2 hours posing and doing stuff that journalist photographer told me to do.

“Look left”

“Look higher”

“Look right”

“Look lower”

“Look at my fist”

“I am going for a close up”

“Smile more and relax”

The camera was superb in that I do not hear shutter clicks and the stills I saw in his digital camera looked good. I was amazed at how long the telescopic lens was.

Amazing how technology has improved over the years to yield such high performing cameras!

I was told the publication was slated for this coming Monday, 28 Feb 2022!

Famous? Nah!

Drama Queen? I hope not!

Will it help the readers? I hope so!

It was a fun day, tired but fun as the Journalist Photographer indulged in my love for my inanimate furballs haha!

Life

The title of this post sounds so cliche! But hang on, I have lots to talk about life or rather, “write” on the topic of life.

I must state that I am no guru of any sort…hmm…maybe Guru of the Garfield kind. For sure, I am a guru of Garfields. Haha!

I am not a guru of life! I do not do yoga – darn poses with my bag of bones will only invite trouble I tell you.

I used to measure the road i.e. long walks and count steps which is why I call it, measuring the road. Think about it – it is exactly that although we have fitbits or apps to record them. Well, now I cannot do it. It started with surgeries on the foot to remove this or that bone – dem bones I call it! Haha!

Then I to have both hands massacred and fixed. Up till now, I have little feelings in my fingers! Sigh! dem nerves as Dr Bones says…I took too long to release the nerves and so, this is as good as it gets!

I am not up to walks just yet as I want to do brisk walks to remove the fat cells. But fat cells won and I need to wait till I am better.

Life – so what is it?

I was told by smart ones, that we are born to die! How ironically true isn’t it? Life has an expiration date.

Today, I received a total of 5 text messages from MR EX. I was caught up in a conference call and by the time I saw it, it was deleted and he attempted to call me but was blocked. His request was he “feels like jumping off a building and that I can read about it in the papers tomorrow”

Being a former friend, I told him to call SOS and speak to someone. I genuinely felt sorry for him as mental illness if what he says is true, is not to be trivialised. I replied him to say that if he really wants a listening ear, I am here for him to listen.

Next things I knew, he blatantly asked me for $10,000 being urgent loan.

I really salute this MR EX. A prominent business man, famous in the internet, social media and the list of who’s who and wants me to part SGD10,000 [USD7,430.37 or Euro6,551.06] to him? Just like that?

One word – NUTS!! For one, I do not have a printing press of dollars and I work hard for my money. I know he is an abyss when it comes to money!

If he is that poor (I honestly think he is scamming me), which I think he is not, I will pay for his food and essentials. But not for his glamourous generous donations to look good amongst the who’s who!

MR EX is scamming me and thought that since I “loved” him, I will be soft hearted to just transfer the money to him! Sheesh!

If I had it, I would spend it on myself isn’t it? Instead of scrimping and saving, paying for my medical bills and trying to build a nest egg for my retirement?

MR EX is not a good man! He tried. But failed as I see through his con man methods. He can find another Lady to be her lover and tap that person dry, I am not in the market, as I am a weird, mad Garfield hugging kinda lady with enough troubles to sort out.

My advice to MR EX, is to suck it up! Cut your coat according to your cloth and sort out your life. Get the funds from your legal Bimbo and children or relatives!

Sigh a bummer to remind me on this auspicious 22.02.2022 (Asian style of writing today’s date)

Almost Valentine’s Day – No Different Than Any Week Day To Me

Valentine’s Day is commercialisation at its best.

Roses and flowers skyrocket in price and instead of decks the halls with holly, we have deck the aisles with chockies!

I admit that I will love for any man to woo me with flowers or gifts of champagne or chockies or all 3 of these items. Which lady would not like it right?

But in reality I know the cost is astronomical when compared to normal days.

Aah well, I do not have a lover popping out of the hat anytime soon like the bunny rabbit that a magician pulls out of his top hat.

I can safely say that I have not been socialising much since the Covid Pandemic hit and am literally relishing in my own cocoon with my inanimate furballs.

Truth be told, I speak more to my panel of medical specialists than friends. I think the bulk of my friends are fair weathered ones. A few are stalwarts and truly friends who would care to look in on me or care about me to send me food or fruits as it is a challenge for me to be out and about lugging lots of groceries.

I had one specialist surgeon suggesting to meet up over coffee with another surgeon I call Electrician (the surgeon who repairs dem bones I call him LOL!).

Sigh! How will I ever meet a potential spouse or any potential spouse? It would be nice if there was a fairy tale ending of a surgeon who takes care of me, is single and we become mutually attracted to each other and live happily ever after. I roll my eyes as this will never happen!

I only meet weirdos or people who see me as a potential person to be tapped for network resources, business leads or assist in helping them land a deal. I do it out of kindness of my heart but realised how stoopid I am because once it is done, they disappear into the thin air, never to be heard of till the next usage of me comes about.

Sigh! I guess I will wish Garfield Happy Valentine’s Day and know that he will sit next to Mousie and stare back at me with his beady plastic eyes. Now, that is loyalty and unconditional love as an inanimate furball.

For those with live pets, they will enjoy their hugs, woofy licks and or kitty purrs!

Still, I will not be a sour puss and wish all those with partners, husbands and great guys they meet, a Happy Valentine’s Day in advance and may you find true love that will last till you each breathe your last breath. Now that, is romance till the end for life!

Love to all…..

So It’s Sunday! It Is Also the 6th day Of Chinese New Year Of The Tiger!

Sunday, it used to be my fun day,

Sleeping in & my lazy day!

No such luck, no snoozing in day,

As adult me, it is rise and shine at 6am day!

Drats! Being an adult has no fun days,

Just tiresome, worrisome days!

I miss being a kid, where my only worry was passing my exams and getting good grades.

As a teenager, I added on the worry of if my date would turn out right and if I would land a husband of choice!

As a young adult, I realised my knight in shining armour got lost and he and I will never meet. Instead, I was sent MR EX.

Life goes on.

My responsibilities are plentiful as the weight of many things fall unto my shoulders.

Stress, continued stress has taken a major toll on my body and it protested with many many surgeries and stay in the hospitals. The only thing not robbed is my sanity. There is a fine line between sanity and insanity I say!

I am what I think best described as “sanely insane” – I wrap self like a cocoon sometimes and seek solace in our orange stuffed fat cat, Garfield. Garfield the inanimate furball creations of Jim Davis has given me Garfield hugs and seen me through the worst of times.

In every sanity, therein lies some insanity!

I am verbose, can be caustic and a straight talker. I have no time for wishy washy forums or fake people.

I am either the world’s biggest bitch or world’s best friend – I always tell people to take their pick! LOL!

Life goes on…..the good, the bad and the ugly!

Why MR EX Does Not Deserve My Attention

I may know MR EX for a large part of my adult life, but I certainly do not know him as a person.

MR EX is secretive and is one of the most hypocritical guy I have ever known.

Whilst I have been open, transparent and baring my heart to him over the years, MR EX lives a guarded life.

MR EX worships the Lord. He uses the word “Creator” alot but I do not see a God fearing man as he uses it to garner business.

Followers flock to him as he sells dreams, hopes and aspirations to those wanting a better life. MR EX sells himself as the man who can help them “realise” their financial aspirations.

MR EX does not know the meaning of the word “truth” or what it is to be honest or transparent.

I cite an example.

When I shared that I have cancer and that I needed to be re-admitted at Bates for wound issues, MR EX immediately told me he will also be admitted to hospital the day before me and that his doctor said that he may or may not have cancer!

How troll!! MR EX goes on to emphasise that if he dies, his spirit will stick to me without fail and that he will “boo” me.

I lashed at him. In life you have not been by my side to help nor care for me. So, why bother if he is dead! I rolled my eyes!

I told him to get lost and if his spirit thinks of haunting me, then he better be prepared for his spirit to be exorcised and banished to hell for good.

MR EX of late has been trying to get my sympathy or care. His text mesaages would imply he is seriously ill or that ” he is not strong enough to bring things to me and that his minion would do it.

Is MR EX repentive of his past unkind deeds towards me?

Making use of me and then abandoning me?

Am I of sudden use again for him to warrant his trying attempts to get back with me?

I find MR EX very weird.

When I am ill, he says he is ill too.

When I have to undergo surgery, he says that he has to do so too – undergo “several surgeries”

What I cannot fathom an understanding in is – why does he refuse to let up and leave me alone?

Why does he think that in his death, his spirit can hang around me?

MR EX is not nice. He should stick with the Bimbo he chose to walk down the aisle with and haunt her!

Leave me alone MR EX. You are neither a friend nor a brother, much less a friend.

Stop being greedy and stick with the Bimbo you married for life and for her wealth.

You forgot that you did not choose me as I was then not famous, nor an established person in societal stature.

I have not changed. I’m still a nobody and worst still, I am now a Garfield hugging freak!

I talk to my inanimate furball too!

Plus I have cancer.

Garfield’s Home

Garfield is home today. Given he was in Bates with me, I had to give him a disinfectant sponge bath by using Dettol.

His face, beady eyes, paws and tail were wiped, including tail and cottony tummy.

He is getting on in years. Mum bought him for me. He is 27 years old.

Garfield sitting on my marble floor looking out as he is aired dry. He smells good with Dettol…as I know he is clean. I was worried he got home with germs if any from Bates Motel.

Garfield and I are happy to be home and in our own bed.

Hurray!!

Garfield Pack With Compliments From Ex Legal Eagle Colleague

It has been close to 1 year since I last saw Ms Legal Eagle who left our common workplace as she had enough of working with insane hours.

Ms Legal Eagle knew I was nuts about Garfield and when she chanced upon Hotel Carlton offering staycations that came with a Garfield novelty pack valued at $300, she signed up so that she can give me the pack.

She was so sweet to cab to my place and presented it to me. The pack comprised one furball, whom we both fondly address it as the younger brother of my ratty tattered Garfield of more than 32 years. It had the same build and size, except that this plushie was of refiner threads.

Above is a photo showing the items in the pack; (1) 2 baseball caps in black with Garfield image embroidered on it (2) 1 Garfield cushion (3) 50 pcs of 99% BPE Garfield surgical masks (4) 2 soft cottony Garfield bath towels (5) 2 pairs of Garfield socks (6) 2 packets of Garfield stickers (7) 1 Garfield Face towel

I had thought the above towel was a blanket and felt that my mum would love using it for her feet to stay warm. But when I presented it to her and she opened it, we both laughed and knew it was a towel. Mum was conscious of the fact that I love and treasure each Garfield item and told me to keep it for myself. This was despite the fact that my dad was in need of some bath towels. So next week, I will get my dad a Crabtree and Evelyn bath towel that a friend had given me some years back but I did not use it as it was too pretty to be used. In original packaging, brand new, I am sure dad will like it plus another lovely beach towel that I had kept, brand new.

Above is a sample piece of the surgical Garfield mask that I will try to use only when I want to make a statement LOL! Too precious for me to use it wastefully!

Being the sole caregiver, I realised that I run a mini department store that can provide my folks with things they need in an instant. Batteries of various sizes, medicines, items of household needs etc.

It is good for me as it means I need not be dashing off to the stores each time, they need something urgently.

I clocked more than 6,000 steps yesterday and am paying heavily for it now as I was running about getting my folks (please see a separate post on this soon) local hawker fare that they missed eating.

In summary,

Neck pain

Back pain

Leg pain

Hand pain – both hands

Dr Lim was very fast to bark orders for me….ice, take Piroxicam!

I am very grateful to Dr Lim for his kindness as he could have insisted I visit his clinic and be charged as a patient. But he does not do that! He is genuinely kind and has a caring heart. For this, I am grateful always.

Chicago Garfield – A Different Species! [Re-Posted 18 Oct 21, Originally Posted In 2014]

A Garfield From Chicago – Very Different From Those I Have!

Mr Ability To Earn tends to travel to Chicago Business School for his courses, once a year.

During one of his travels to Chicago, he came across this depiction of Garfield. I guess this was fashioned after the animated movie of Garfield with Jennifer Hewitt and it was certainly not the usual look and feel of my range of Garfield collections.

Of course Mr Ability To Earn was very happy – most of the people who knew me well, know of my craze and love for this inanimate fur ball creation of Jim Davis.

So when he returned, he shoved this cat into my face and said, ” Happy Garfield, see what I found in Chicago!”

Mr Ability To Earn has no theatrics and cannot hide surprises. We (Chicken, Bird and I) often call him Mr Wood as he is indeed like Block Wood. Expressionless and always wearing a frozen smile on his face.

I do appreciate his efforts in eyeing potential Garfields.

My first question to him was ” Genuine Garfield or fake?” The look and feel was different. But it said Paws Inc so that was that!

Any how, this Garfield is now nestled amongst his other kind….poor cousins or otherwise, this one is different and like humans, all humans have the same physique but look differently. Still we are called humans, just crafted differently.

Indeed a quiet lesson for me to learn from…..a different Garfield from Chicago 😉